Monday, July 27, 2015

NO MORE Mr. Nice Guy

I have always been one that keeps to myself, avoids conflict at all costs, and rarely speaks my mind no matter how bad I may want to!  This is me, not sure why!

My sister and husband are TOTAL opposite... they open their mouths before they think!!  Is this a good thing or not??  I think not because they embarrass me all the time doing it!

Me, I have always thought that there is a way to handle things without being loud or getting ugly!

Lately, my husband has been joking with me that I have been around him to long because I am getting my open with speaking my mind when I disagree!   I guess I just got tired of being the nice guy (girl) all the time! Maybe it's just me getting older, I don't know!

Tonight I almost lost it on a 11/12 year old.. she just got under my skin!  I caught myself counting to 10 in my head to keep from being really ugly to her!  I know, I know.. I just said there is a better way to handle things without being ugly!

I wouldn't want another adult being ugly to my child; therefore, I tried my best to be firm BUT get my point across!!

Her and my youngest daughter are friends and she has different rules at her house.. she gets away with a lot more than I would ever allow mine to, but that's beside the point!

She got mad at my daughter and decided to start sending her Facebook chat messages that were not very nice.  I was in the bath at the time and my daughter came in crying and asked if she was a bad friend.  I said "No, why?"  This is when she went on to tell me what was happening and I told her not to respond and to ignore her.  Easier said than done, even I know this; because I was boiling... I won't lie!

After I got out of the bath my oldest told me that she had messaged her and told her to leave her sister alone.  (Big Smile) It's always nice to see that she is taking up for her, but I told her not to be ugly or anything because that wouldn't fix anything!

I logged onto Facebook to see what was going on... and that is when I saw it!!  She had posted an ugly message on my daughters wall!!! OMGosh I wanted to go off!!!  This is so uncalled for!!  So, I kindly replied to the post telling her not to ever post anything on her wall again... in ALL CAPS!! This Mama-Bear wanted to go for blood!  (lol)  I guess it worked because she removed the post before I could edit or reply again.

It is so hard to stay out of things when it involves my kids!

Instead of sending a message to her phone telling her as nicely as I could to knock it off (all the private messages calling her names and being mean) I decided to send a message to her mom instead asking her to handle it.  I think that was best, but I wonder if anything was even said, but hoping it was.

Here's the thing... I believe that if you are a friend you don't treat other friends this way!  Calling her ugly and saying hateful things isn't being a friend!!!  ((Just my opinion))

I know kids that are about to enter Middle School are this way, flip-flopping back and forth, one minute they're friends and the next they are not... BUT it doesn't make it any easier being the mom!  I don't want to choose her friends, BUT I will NOT allow her to hang with people who are going to treat her this way!

I wasn't ugly, even though I really wanted to be, but I let her know that this was unacceptable and it wouldn't be tolerated! This is exactly what I would have wanted her parent to do if my child was doing what she was.

Regardless of the situation, I don't think posting ugly messages on a friends wall when your upset or not getting along with them is uncalled-for (again, just my opinion), and as a parent I will block their friends who don't understand that!!

SO... I wanna know

  1. Am I over-reacting??
  2. What would you have done in this situation?
  3. Do you think I was in the wrong?  Should I have just stayed out of it?
  4. What kind of person are you.. Do you speak before you think?  (or)  Do you not react unless you've been pushed way-to-far?

.... Let me know what you think!!